"WednesdayReflection"
14th February 2024
'J.John offers'
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Heroes of the Faith:
Saint Valentine
I can't resist making Saint Valentine my hero this week. I need no excuse to affirm love, romance and marriage.
Now before I talk about Saint Valentine, let me say something to those of you who, for whatever reason, will not be receiving any physical or electronic messages of affection on February 14th.
It is that there is nothing wrong with being single.
We are all single in our youth and, unless a husband and wife die on the same day, even those of us who are married will face singleness.
We live at a time when, misled by 'the media', romance is seen as a magic something that transforms our lives, adds a sparkle to existence and gives everything in life meaning.
Sadly, romance can become a replacement for God and, like all such replacements, it is inadequate and will disappoint all who trust in it.
Who you and I are is defined by our relationship to God, not by whether we are in a relationship or married.
Some are called by God to be single, some have singleness thrust upon them, but in Christ all of us have extraordinary value and can find true contentment.
Now let me return to Saint Valentine.
Valentine was a bishop who lived in Italy during the third century and was an important figure during the reign of Roman Emperor Claudius Gothicus (Claudius II) from 268 to 270 ad.
The bishop was a promoter of Christian marriage in a culture where the men preferred their relationships to be much more free and easy.
The bishop's enthusiasm for marrying couples irritated the emperor who was fighting a war with the Goths (hence the nickname Gothicus) and who believed that marriage weakened the fighting ability of soldiers.
Finally, while in Rome, Bishop Valentine was judged.
When he refused to deny Christ, he was imprisoned, tortured and, on February 14th, 269 ad, martyred.
Various other tales talk about Valentine trying to convert the emperor, giving sight to his judge's daughter and even sending a message to his jailer's daughter with the ending 'your Valentine'.
Perhaps.
Whatever the truth of this story, it is a fact that the Christian view of marriage was considered unpopular and even unhealthy by Roman society and that it did spark hostility.
This was particularly the case with men: as at other times and places, women have found something very appealing in the way that Christianity protects them from being used and then discarded.
The first formal link between Saint Valentine and romance that anybody knows is a poem by Chaucer in 1380 in which he mentions that on Saint Valentine's Day birds choose their mates.
The rest, you might say, is history and, increasingly, marketing.
But given that, in the northern hemisphere at least, February is so often a cold, dark month, it's understandable that a celebration that lightens the mood became popular.
Reflecting on Saint Valentine, I find myself encouraged by three things in the context of marriage.
First, Valentine celebrated marriage.
Christianity is not against romance.
The Old Testament's Song of Songs has embarrassed many with its exuberant celebration of love.
In fact, Christianity defends romance against twin enemies.
The first enemy - rare but not unknown in our day - is to ignore romance, rejecting the whole business of love or considering it merely a necessity for the continuation of the human race.
The second enemy is to idolise romance as an experience that gives meaning to life.
Neither view can be the basis for a happy, long-term relationship.
A marriage - and certainly a Christian one - puts into place a firm spiritual, social and legal framework that enables a relationship to survive the years of ups and downs, joys and sorrows, peace and panic that occurs in all marriages.
Second, Valentine was committed to marriage.
He encouraged marriage and openly married men and women.
He did not simply present the theoretical idea that marriage might be a good idea but lived out support for marriage.
We may not be in the business of conducting marriage services, but we ought to have the same commitment to supporting marriage.
Third, Valentine was courageous about marriage.
It was his defiant commitment to marriage in the face of his culture that led him to be executed.
It takes courage to go to the altar in marriage; it takes a lot more courage to go to the scaffold for it.
We need courage and determination in standing up for marriage and, if we are married, to live out our own marriages with love and faithfulness.
So whether or not you receive some loving message that sets your heart aflutter this February 14th, let's affirm - as the good bishop did - love, romance and marriage.
J.John
is an Evangelist, minister, speaker, broadcaster and writer.
He has been in ministry for four decades. He has spoken in towns, cities and universities in 69 countries.
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